Le Monde is, and I quote from the website, "one of the premier boutique hotels in Edinburgh. Its popularity and reputation continues to grow." Really?
We met in the bar, Vienna. I have to admit I was pleasantly surprised - the clientèle were mixed - pensioners, teenagers and a whole range in between. The bar itself was very nice. A good start. Then we went upstairs to "Paris" for dinner ...
Atmosphere
Styled as "an intimate space for romantic liaisons" (I wasn't there on a romantic liaison) I expected something subtle. Instead we (not me ...!) had to ask for the music to be turned down so we didn't have to shout to one another. I was also a bit put off by people dancing when we were eating - I know, I know: I'm old (fashioned) - a restaurant should just be a restaurant ... No?And then, as I move a water glass away it sticks to my hand - yuck! New glass requested immediately ... I am left feeling a little bit queasy. I suspect we are not the "restaurant's" favourite table.
Food
I can safely say that this is one of the worst dining experiences I have ever had! To start: I chose the ham terrine with apple chutney and rye bread. Or to put it another way - a completely tasteless terrine with an identical (non) tasting chutney. At least the toasted rye bread had some flavour to it. There was no salt and pepper on the table either, so I couldn't try to improve it. The textures of the food were different but that's really about all I can say. I would love to admit I was exaggerating here but no - I have never eaten anything before that tastes of nothing. So to get two on the same plate ... well it certainly was an achievement.
We also had mussels, scallops and bruschetta. The most interesting comment passed was that the sauce with the mussels was hot. I said nothing, as did most others ...
For the main: there was a mix up - one person ordered a rib-eye with no tomato, 2 others ordered rare sirloin. The rib-eye came with a tomato, one of the sirloins without ... confusion reigns as I point out that a rib eye is clearly different from a sirloin and that I have the wrong dish - I was happy to swap. No that would not do. The dishes must be taken back to the kitchen because neither of the two waiters knew their rib-eye from their &!*!. Sure enough, a few minutes later, back came the plates with the tomato switched. Apparently I was correct.
So, rare steak should be (more than) a bit bloody, right?? If we peered intently at it we could just about detect a hint of pink. Our rare steaks came medium to well done. If they had been cooked as ordered they would have been very good - the quality of the steak only ruined by the incompetence of the chef. And then the temperature: the steak was cold, the chips that came with it even colder. The mushroom was quite nice (but then it's difficult to screw up a grilled mushroom). I kind of felt obliged to eat the (half green) tomato.
Lamb shanks were also ordered. I was too afraid to ask anyone what they thought, and I suspect everyone else felt the same as we talked about everything but the food.
I skipped dessert and instead chose a large espresso: it was excellent.
The Bill
So we ask for the bill. As we divvy it up, someone mentions a tip. "Have they included a service charge?" someone else asks? Yes they have: so we get a bill with a service charge included plus a space for a tip. Cheap trick? We didn't leave any extra.Overall Rating
It's not a restaurant. A restaurant should serve good food. A restaurant should not be dominated by a huge bar - reference Harvey Nichols Forth Floor for how it could be done. You should not have to shout in a restaurant. A restaurant should not boast of the quality of its steak and yet be unable to tell the difference between cuts, or be able to cook it correctly. This was a truly terrible dining experience. Burger King is far better - at least you get what you expect there. And I have to say the food is a damned site tastier.If only 1 person reads this and decides not to go, my work is done. This was a huge letdown.
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